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What is holding you back. The end holding you by your side I never thought you would turn to the person that you have been I look back at the memories of you and think to myself that how could someone as loving kind and beautiful turn to be someone that nobody knows and that you yourself don't even know the hurtful things that have been said have me to turn away from you something I vowed I would never do but I have had to for sake of being able to pick what ruin you have left me in emotionally to look at you because I want to get down on one knee and ask for you to come back but I know In my heart through all the scars and pain I can not allow myself to fall back in that Web I love you today tomorrow and forever even though you don't realize it I have and now that I see things in such a clearer view I can't go back to putting blinders on to the pain you caused it's you can move on overnight and I can't trust anyone to the pieces of my heart that are left I won't be able to go through an ounce more of what you have done to the family and what you did to ours and us one day if you ever wake up long enough to really realize that what you had was someone who loved you UNCONDITIONALLY and when you wake up to it I hope you are ready for the feeling because waking up searching for the woman that you gave your heart to which is no longer beside you really hurts I kept the things that hurt me inside I kept the problems we had to myself I never told the things we did because I didn't want people to look at the woman I love so much and know the things the honest true things that had happened you won't understand today but one day you will and I unfortunately will not be able to catch you as you fall I want to but I can't I care so much about you and what we had I stood there and took the humiliation and criticism to try and you as a person my best friend and my true love I still go to bed loving you and damn if I don't wake up doing the same when I can actually sleep you have twisted my heart into doing things i never wanted to do against you but I have to bc it's no longer about us you that it's now what's best for what we brought In this world the family that was supposed to grow old and look back and be able to say that it was worth the troubles the hurt the pain for one happy moment takes so much pain away but it's not going to happen it's not that I don't want to talk to you I do but my heart shreds even more when I have to hang up or you stop abruptly I took a chance and gambled my heart I lost you won that if you read this and it's you I love you I miss you everyday I miss our family we had we were not perfect but we could have had the fairytale ending to bad now bc damage is done and there is no turning back on the one way street you turned us down I am waiting for genuine down to earth women that can show me that nice mans don't always finish last. Drinks and nsa fun plus sized black girl, interested in getting together with a cool easy going boy for some nsa fun. I asked this boy that I thought was your boss about your relationship status, nowI think he has a thing for you himself, and he was trying to keep me from asking you out, because he told me stuff like you are in like with him,and then he said he caught you in the pro shop after hours doing freaks stuff on the ball shining machine. And World Sr.

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